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¹ Early that morning, the religious institution had decided to put Jesus to death. ² They tied him up and handed him over to Pilate, the Roman governor.

Judas Kills Himself

³ When Judas heard they were gonna kill Jesus, his heart was crushed because he was the cause of it all. He went back to the church and gave them the thirty pieces of silver back. ⁴ "I have sinned," he said, "I have double-crossed an innocent man."

"That don't matter to us," they replied. "This innocent blood will be on your hands, not ours!"

⁶ The segundos in the church picked up the money and said, "We can't even use this for our church bank account because it's blood money." ⁷ So they used the money to buy a little plot of land to use as a cemetery for foreigners. ⁸ That place is still called the field of blood to this day. ⁹ Then, the words of the great cowboy Jeremiah came true, "They took the thirty pieces of silver, the price of his double cross, ¹⁰ and used it to buy the foreigners' field."

Jesus on Trial before Pilate

¹¹ Meanwhile, Jesus stood before the governor of the territory and the governor asked him, "Are you the Jews' boss?"

"Yup," Jesus replied.

¹² When he was accused by the head honchos of the church, he didn't answer. ¹³ Then Pilate asked him, "Don't you hear what they are sayin' about you?" ¹⁴ But Jesus didn't answer. He didn't say one word about any of the charges. His silence baffled Pilate.

Pilate Signs the Death Warrant

¹⁵ There was an old tradition during this time of the year, to release one prisoner who the crowd chose. ¹⁶ There was a ruthless bandito named Barabbas who was in jail at this time. ¹⁷ When the crowd gathered around, Pilate asked them, "Which one do you want me to release: Barabbas, or Jesus, who is called the Boss's Son?" ¹⁸ He knew that it was out of jealousy that they had shoehorned Jesus and turned him in.

¹⁹ While Pilate was actin' as judge and executioner, his wife sent him a note that said, "Don't have anything to do with that innocent fellow! I have been plagued by awful dreams because of this."

²⁰ But the head honchos of the church lobbied the crowd and persuaded them to release the bandito and have Jesus strung up.

²¹ "Pick your poison and tell me which one you will have turned loose," said the governor.

"Barabbas the Bandito!" they all cried in unison.

²² "If you choose Barabbas, what do you want done with Jesus?" asked Pilate. They all yelled, "Kill him!"

²³ "Why? What in the world has this man done to deserve this?" asked Pilate. But they got all slobber-mouthed and yelled, "Crucify him!"

²⁴ When Pilate saw that there was fixin' to be a riot, he dipped his hands in a horse trough and washed them sayin', "This is y'alls doin', not mine. I'm innocent of this man's blood and I wash my hands of this whole ordeal."

²⁵ The crowd yelled, "Let this killin' fall on our children's souls!"

²⁶ Pilate then ordered the release of the bandito Barabbas and had Jesus horse- whipped before he was to be nailed to the cross.

Jesus Is Mocked and Insulted

²⁷ Pilate's men took Jesus and put about two hundred armed guards around him. ²⁸ They stripped him out of his jeans and shirt and slung a purple horse blanket around him like a robe. ²⁹ Then they wove together a crown of mesquite thorns and shoved it on his head. They gave him a stick to hold like a king's scepter and they knelt down mockingly in front of him sayin', "All hail the boss of the Jews!" ³⁰ They jerked his stick from him and beat him with it as they spit all over him. ³¹ After their sport with him, they took the purple blanket off and dressed him back in his trail gear. Then they tied him up and led him away to be nailed to the cross.

Jesus Is Strung up on the Cross

³² As they traveled to the place where they would kill him, a fellow named Simon was forced to carry the cross-beam Jesus was tryin' to carry. ³³ They came to the place called Golgotha, which means "Skull Hill." ³⁴ They offered Jesus a drink of wine mixed with a narcotic, but he spit it out as soon as he tasted it. ³⁵ When they had strung him up on the cross and nailed him to it to be sure he wouldn't fall off, they rolled dice to see who would get his gear. ³⁶ They all hunkered down to watch him die. ³⁷ Above Jesus's head, they nailed a crudely painted sign that said, "This here's Jesus, the Boss of the Jews." ³⁸ Two bank robbers were strung up beside him, one on his off-side and the other on his left. ³⁹ A bunch of no-accounts rode by and cussed Jesus ⁴⁰ sayin', "You claimed you were gonna destroy the church and rebuild it in three days! If you're the Boss's Son, come down off that cross and prove it, you coward!"

⁴¹ The head honchos of the church acted in the same sorry fashion. They made fun of him and said, ⁴² "He rescued other cowboys, now let's see if he can come down off that cross and rescue himself. If he does, then we'll believe he is who he says he is. ⁴³ He trusts in God. Let the Almighty save him if he really wants him. Jesus said himself, 'I am the Boss's Son.'" ⁴⁴ The bank robbers also talked real bad to him.

Jesus Dies

⁴⁵ From about noon until three, darkness covered the territory. ⁴⁶ About three o'clock, Jesus yelled out, "Eloi, Eloi, lema sabachthani?" —which translated into cowboy terms means, "My God, my God, why have you shucked out on me?"

⁴⁷ Some of the fellows standin' nearby said, "He's a hollerin' for Elijah!"

⁴⁸ One of the bystanders ran and filled his hat with soured wine and lifted it up to Jesus so he could get a drink. ⁴⁹ The rest of them said, "Leave him be. Let's see if Elijah will come a ridin' down to get him!"

⁵⁰ Then Jesus gave one last mighty yell and he died.

⁵¹ At that very moment, the drapery in the church that separated man from God was split down the middle startin' at the top and comin' down. The whole earth shook and boulders split wide open like busted watermelons. ⁵² Graves were opened up and a bunch of cowboys who had rode for the brand got up and walked, raised back to life. ⁵³ They rode out of the graveyards, and after Jesus came back to life, they went into Jerusalem and were seen by a lot of folks.

⁵⁴ When the deputy and those who were with him guardin' Jesus saw everything that was happenin', they were terrified and they cried out, "Oh no! He really was the Boss's Son."

⁵⁵ There was a bunch of women watchin' from afar. They had followed Jesus and cooked for him on many occasions. ⁵⁶ Among them were Mary Magdalene, James and Joseph's momma Mary, and the mother of Zebedee's boys.

Jesus Is Buried in a Cave

⁵⁷ When evening' was a comin', a rich fellow named Joseph who had done some studyin' and travelin' with Jesus, ⁵⁸ went to Pilate and asked for Jesus's body. Pilate agreed and gave the order. ⁵⁹ Old Joseph took the body and wrapped it in a clean white sheet and ⁶⁰ put the body in a cave that had been hollowed out of a rock for Joseph when he died. They rolled a boulder in front of the entrance to keep the two-legged and four-legged coyotes out. ⁶¹ Mary Magdalene and the other Mary were sittin' there watchin' from nearby.

Deputies Guard the Tomb

⁶² The next day, the head honchos of the church and the religious know-it-alls went to Pilate.

⁶³ "Your honor," they said, "whilst that fellow we killed was still alive, he had said he would come back to life three days later. ⁶⁴ We want you to post some deputies at his grave to keep Jesus's cowboys from stealin' the body and claimin' that he come back to life. Jesus deceived many good and honest folks while he was alive, but if they pull this off, it will be worse than the first trick."

⁶⁵ "Take a few deputies," Pilate said. "Do whatever you think you need to do to make the grave secure." ⁶⁶ They went and stretched some rope across the entrance with some mud at each end so's they could tell if it had been messed with. They told the deputies to stand guard and not let anyone mess with the body or the grave.