Read the Bible

¹ When Jesus finished up talkin' with everyone, he left and went into the territory on the other side of the Jordan Creek. ² Truckloads of people followed him there and he was willin' to help everyone who needed it.

³ Some of the religious know-it-alls tried to corner him with some fancy talkin'. They asked, "Don't you think a man should be able to bust up his marriage for whatever reason he wants?"

⁴ "Don't you remember," he replied, "that the Boss made man and woman and ⁵ said that whenever they get married, they become one. ⁶ So they ain't two people anymore, but rather one. Whatever the Boss brings together no man should separate."

⁷ "Why then," they replied, "did Moses say a man could fill out a piece of paper that busted up the wedlock and then he could send her packin'?"

⁸ Jesus told 'em, "He said y'all could divorce because you are a foolish bunch of people, but that's not the way my Dad planned it. ⁹ I'm tellin' you, if any cowboy sends his bride away for any reason besides cheatin' on him, and marries another gal, he has committed adultery."

¹⁰ The cowboys on his crew said, "Man, if that's the case, we all ought to stay bachelors!"

¹¹ Jesus replied, "Not every cowboy can live up to the Boss's standards on marriage. ¹² Some men have been made into steers by birth and some by the business end of a pocket knife. Other cowboys have not got hitched because of ridin' for me. If this is the case, then all should accept it."

Jesus Blesses the Cowboy Kids

¹³ Then all the little kiddos gathered around Jesus so he could pray for 'em. But as soon as they got close, Jesus's cowboys started tellin' 'em to stand back.

¹⁴ Jesus shushed his boys and said, "Y'all let these little cowboys and cowgirls come and sit with me. Don't ever keep a kid from me because heaven belongs to folks like these." ¹⁵ When he had shook hands with all the kids and blessed 'em, he rode off.

Jesus and the Rich Fellow

¹⁶ A fellow walked up to Jesus and said, "Hey amigo! What kind of good deeds do I have to do to get an eternal job on the Boss's place?"

¹⁷ "Why are you askin' me about good things?" Jesus replied. "There is only One that fits the word good. If you want an eternal place on the ranch, you must hold to all the commandments."

¹⁸ "Which ones in particular?" the fellow asked.

Jesus said, "Don't kill, don't fool around on your spouse, don't rob, don't lie about other folks, ¹⁹ respect your ma and pa, and take care of your neighbors better'n you take care of yourself."

²⁰ "I've done all of these," the rich fellow said. "Is there anything else?"

²¹ Jesus smiled and said, "If you want to get an eternal spot on the ranch, go and give everything you got to those who don't have anything. By givin' everything you have away here, you will receive much more in heaven. Then, when you're done, come and ride with me."

²² When the rich fellow heard this, he hung his head and walked away unwillin' to do as Jesus asked.

²³ Jesus told his cowboys, "It's tough for a rich man to get an eternal spot on the ranch. ²⁴ It's probably easier for a bull to give birth to a coyote than a rich man to enter the Forever Pastures."

²⁵ This spooked the cowboys and they asked, "Who can get in then?"

²⁶ Jesus looked at 'em and said, "Cowboys can't get themselves in, that would be impossible. But with God, all things are possible."

²⁷ Pete said, "We've left everything behind and saddled up with you. What is that gonna get us?"

²⁸ Jesus said, "I'm tellin' you, when all things are made new again and I sit on top of the hill on my Daddy's ranch, you cowboys who have followed me will sit on the twelve hills around me and judge the twelve territories of Israel. ²⁹ And every cowboy or cowgirl who has left their own ranch, or their families, or kids or fields for me will receive a hundred times as much as they left and receive eternal life. ³⁰ But many of the first to ride with me will be the last to come through the gate, and many who are the last to ride with me will be the first ones through the gate.