Lectionary Calendar
Wednesday, December 4th, 2024
the First Week of Advent
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Read the Bible

Simplified Cowboy Version

Mark 15

1 Very early in the morning, all the religious leaders had made their plan against Jesus. They tied him up and handed him over to Pilate, the local Roman governor in charge.

2 Pilate asked Jesus, "Are you the boss of the Jews?" Jesus replied, "You said it, but I ain't denying it."

3 This got the religious leaders all riled up. They were screaming and yelling accusations at Jesus.

4 Pilate questioned Jesus again, "Are you not going to defend yourself? Listen to everything they are saying about you!"

5 But Jesus kept his mouth shut and didn't say a word.

Pilate was amazed that a man could keep quiet in the face of so many deadly allegations.

6 During the Feast of Flatbread, and the celebration of Passover, it was a tradition to release one person who was in jail and waiting execution. 7 There was one particularly nasty fellow named Barabbas, who was locked up for murder.

8 The crowd asked Pilate to release a prisoner and he asked if they would rather release Jesus or Barabbas. 9 Pilate said, "Do you want me to let the Boss of the Jews go?" 10 But he knew the religious leaders were just jealous of Jesus. Pilate was stalling and trying to help him all he could.

11 The religious leaders stirred up the crowd against Jesus and they lobbied to have Barabbas released instead.

12 Pilate, still trying to work out a deal, asked, "Then what am I supposed to do with the one who y'all call the Boss of the Jews?"

13 They shouted, "String him up on the cross!"

Pilate was dismayed and asked, "What has this man done that is so wrong?"

The crowd didn't answer except to chant, "String him up . . . String him up . . . String him up!"

15 Pilate didn't want a riot on his hands, so he released Barabbas and sent Jesus to be whipped. After that, he would be strung up on the cross.

Jesus Is Made Fun Of

16 The Roman soldiers led Jesus into the Governor's mansion and gathered everyone around. 17 They put a purple cape on him and wove a crown of thorns that they smashed on his head. The blood ran into Jesus's eyes and down his face.

18 They paraded mockingly in front of Jesus and saluted him saying, "All hail the Boss of the Jews!"

19 They repeatedly hit him on the head, and spit on Jesus. They knelt down in fake homage and made fun of him for a long time. 20 Finally, when they'd had their fill of fun, they stripped the purple cape off him and led him away to string him up on the cross.

21 Jesus was carrying the cross piece he would be nailed to, but could go no further due to his injuries. The soldiers grabbed a guy named Simon and made him carry the cross piece.

They String Jesus Up

22 They got up to a hill they call Golgotha (which means "Skull Hill"). 23 They offered him a shot of wine with some numbing stuff mixed in, but Jesus refused it. 24 Then they nailed him to the cross and strung him up naked. They gambled and threw dice to see who would get this famous man's clothes. 25 This all happened about nine o'clock in the morning.

26 They put a sign above Jesus's head that said, "Boss of the Jews" and 27 they strung up two outlaws on crosses on both sides of Jesus.

29 Many who passed by shouted, "You said you could destroy the church building in three days and then rebuild it . . . 30 if you're that powerful, why don't you get yourself off that cross and do it!"

31 Even the religious leaders made fun of him by saying, "He saved many people, but he can't even save himself. What a joke! 32 If he really is the Chosen One, let him come down off that cross and we'll believe it."

Even those being crucified with him made fun of him.

33 It was now the midday hour, and when the clock had struck high noon, darkness descended over the entire country for three hours. 34 About three o'clock in the afternoon, Jesus yelled out, "Eloi, Eloi, lema sabachthani?" which means, "My God, my God, why have you forgotten about me?"

35 When some people standing around heard him, they said, "Listen! Jesus is calling out for Elijah!"

36 Then someone lifted up a sponge soaked with vinegar and gave it to Jesus. Others said, "Leave him alone. Let's see if Elijah does somehow come riding up to save him."

Jesus Breathes His Last

37 Jesus looked up and cried out with a loud voice and let out his last breath. 38 In the main church, there was a thick curtain that separated God's holy place from the rest of the building. When Jesus died, this curtain was torn in two from the top to the bottom. No longer would God be separated from his people.

39 One of the soldiers who stood at the foot of the cross saw how Jesus died and said, "I think we've screwed up boys. This really was God's Son!"

40 Also seeing his death were some women watching from a distance. These women included Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James, and Salome. 41 In Galilee, these women had traveled with Jesus and taken care of him. There were other women there also who had gone to Jerusalem with him.

Laid to Rest

42 It was the day before the day of rest (the day before the Sabbath Day) and as the sun was setting, 43 a local leader named Joseph of Arimathea and believer of Jesus, went and boldly asked Pilate for the body of Jesus. 44 Pilate seemed surprised to find out that Jesus had already died. 45 He called for a soldier and asked him if Jesus had indeed already died. When it was confirmed, Pilate gave Joseph permission to take the body.

46 Joseph took a fine linen sheet, took the body down and wrapped it up. He placed Jesus's body in a tomb cut into the rock and rolled a large stone in front of the entrance. 47 Mary Magdalene and Mary, the mother of Joseph, watched the burial happen.

 
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