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Changing Who You Ride For

¹ About this time, some people asked Jesus if it was because of sin that God had allowed Pilate to kill some people from Galilee who were making sacrifices at the main church in Jerusalem. ² Jesus answered, "Do you think they were allowed to die because their sin was greater than someone else's? ³ Absolutely not! I guarantee you that was not the case. But if you don't quit riding for yourselves and start riding for the Boss, y'all will die too. ⁴ What about all those people who tragically died when the tower in Siloam fell on them? Was it because of their sin that they died? ⁵ No, it wasn't. But if you don't change your sorry ways, you too will all die."

⁶ Then Jesus told 'em this tale, "A rancher had a cow in his herd that hadn't calved in three years. ⁷ He told the top hand, 'For three years now I've let this cow stay on the ranch, but she hasn't calved yet. Ship her off. Why should she eat green grass and not give anything in return?'

⁸ "The top hand replied, 'Boss, give her one more year. I'll check her teeth and give her some vitamins and do everything I can to be sure she is healthy. ⁹ Maybe next year she will calve. Don't give up on her yet, but if she still hasn't calved by next year, we will sell her off.'"

Jesus Fixes the Crippled

¹⁰ Not long after, Jesus was giving a clinic in one of the churches. This particular day was the day of rest. ¹¹ A woman who was possessed by an evil spirit was there. This spirit had her hunched over for nearly twenty years. The poor lady couldn't stand up straight. ¹² Jesus saw her and felt sorry for her condition. He told her to come to him and said, "My dear, I am setting you free." ¹³ Jesus placed his hands on her, and she immediately stood up straight and gave thanks to the Boss.

¹⁴ The church leader stood up and clearly had his phylacteries in a wad. He said, "There are six days when you can come for healing. Come on one of those days, not the day of rest. It is a holy day, and no work should be done, not even healing."

¹⁵ Then Jesus fired back, "You sir are nothing but a no-good hypocrite. Don't you unhalter your horse or let the milk cow out to graze of the day of rest? Don't you water your animals? ¹⁶ Here stands one of Abraham's children who Satan has been tormenting for eighteen years. Why is she less than animals? Shouldn't she be set free also—even on the day of rest?"

¹⁷ The crowd that had gathered erupted in applause, and the hypocritical church leader and his minions skulked away in shame.

Mustard and Sourdough

¹⁸ Then Jesus asked, "What's God's outfit like? How can I explain it to you? ¹⁹ It's like a tiny mustard seed that someone plants in a garden and then it grows to become a nice big tree that the birds use for nesting."

²⁰ Again he asked, "What is God's outfit really like? ²¹ It's like a little sourdough starter that works its way through the dough to make it better than before."

The Ranch Gate

²² Jesus continued teaching in villages and cow camps on his way to Jerusalem. ²³ Someone once asked him, "How many will end up on God's ranch?"

He replied, ²⁴ "You need to try hard to get on with God's outfit before it's too late. Many will want on, but only a few will be chosen. ²⁵ When the boss shuts the gate, it will be too late. You will stand outside and beg and plead, but the boss will say, 'I will not. You're not one of my cowboys.'

²⁶ "Then you'll say, 'But I went to one of your clinics and even ate with your cowboys.'

²⁷ "And he will say, 'Get away from me. I offered you a place a long time ago, and you refused. The gate has been open all this time for anyone who wanted to come in, but now it's too late. Get away from here and get away from me.' ²⁸ When you finally realize the ranch you will spend eternity on, you will be in such severe pain that you will cry out and gnash your teeth as you suffer endlessly. You'll look across the fence and see Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, and all of the old cowboys who rode for God. They'll be happy on God's outfit, but you'll never step foot on it. ²⁹ People from all over the world will be on God's outfit. ³⁰ But understand this, the cowboys who showed up last will be the first to see God and the ones who came in first will be riding drag."

Jerusalem Beware

³¹ As this was happening, some Pharisees told him, "You better lope on out of here if you want to live. Herod Antipas has put a bounty on your head."

³² Jesus said, "Go tell that old fox that I will keep on whipping demons and healing people as I head toward Jerusalem. ³³ None of y'all will stop me from doing what the Boss has sent me to do. Besides, Jerusalem is where God's cowboys go to die."

³⁴ "Jerusalem, old Jerusalem. She is the city that kills God's cowboys and his messengers. I've wanted to put her calves in one pen and protect them, but you are not willing. ³⁵ Your house is forgotten, and you won't see me until you say, 'Here comes God's Top Hand who comes in the name of the Boss.'"