Verse-by-Verse Bible Commentary
Proverbs 27:10

Clarke's Commentary

Verse Proverbs 27:10. Thine own friend — A well and long tried friend is invaluable. Him that has been a friend to thy family never forget, and never neglect. And, in the time of adversity, rather apply to such a one, than go to thy nearest relative, who keeps himself at a distance.

Bridgeway Bible Commentary

The valuable things of life (27:1-27)

Over-confidence, self-praise, stupidity and jealousy must all be avoided (27:1-4). True friends will show the inner love they have for each other by being open and honest with each other. Over-pleasantness may be a sign of a deceitful heart (5-6). Those with many possessions do not find contentment; the poor are more than satisfied if they can get what the rich throw away (7). Among the most priceless of possessions are a happy home and faithful friends (8-10).
Common sense will save people a lot of trouble and bring happiness to their parents (11-12), but those who give rash guarantees must be prepared to suffer the consequences (13). A loudmouthed but insincere friend is a curse, and a nagging wife can make life miserable (14-16). Where there is true understanding, differences of personality and viewpoint are of benefit to all concerned. Faithfulness to one another brings its reward (17-18).
The mind of a person reflects the true self. Therefore, a person’s worth must be judged by reputation and character, not by possessions or wealth. Material things cannot fully satisfy (19-21). The character of the fool is easily judged, for no amount of corrective discipline will bring any lasting change (22). Instead of thinking only of building up wealth, a person should combine conscientiousness in daily work with trust in God’s provision (23-27).

Coffman's Commentaries on the Bible

"Thine own friend, and thy father's friend, forsake not; And go not to thy brother's house in the day of thy calamity. Better is a neighbor that is near than a brother that is far off."

Two other proverbs are concerned with the admonition we have here. They are Proverbs 17:17 and Proverbs 18:24. Also Proverbs 19:7 explains how it is that brothers may hate each other. See our comments on those proverbs. What is related here is a sad fact that brothers (or sisters) may sometimes be quite unwilling to aid each other in times of misfortune or distress. Cook revised the proverb here as follows: "Better is the neighbor who is really `near' in heart and spirit than a brother who is `near' by blood but 'far off in brotherly feeling."Barnes' Notes on the Old Testament (Grand Rapids: Baker Book House, a 1987 reprint of the 1878 edition), op. cit., p. 74.

Barnes' Notes on the Whole Bible

“Better is a neighbor” who is really “near” in heart and spirit, than a brother who though closer by blood, is “far off” in feeling.

Smith's Bible Commentary

Chapter 27

Boast not thyself of to-morrow; for thou knowest not what a day may bring foRuth ( Proverbs 27:1 ).

Very good. This is, of course, the idea is taken up in the New Testament book of James. He said, "Go to now, ye who say, 'Tomorrow we'll do this and that and the other.'" He said, "You should rather say, 'If the Lord wills, tomorrow we will do this, that and the other.' Because you really don't know what tomorrow's going to bring. It's all in God's hands. You don't even know if you're going to be here."

Jesus speaks about the man who said, "What am I going to do? I'm increased with goods. I have need of nothing and all. I know what I'll do. I'll tear down my barns and build bigger and so forth that I may hold all of my goods." And the Lord said unto him, "Thou fool, this night thy soul shall be required" ( Luke 12:20 ).

So don't boast of tomorrow what you're going to do. "Boast not thyself of tomorrow; for you don't know what the day is going to bring forth." Also Jesus tells us that we are not to worry about tomorrow, taking anxious thought for tomorrow. What I'm going to eat, what I'm going to drink, what I'm going to wear. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof. So don't be all worried or concerned about tomorrow or don't boast about tomorrow what I'm going to be doing tomorrow. You don't know what God has in mind for you.

Next proverb is a very good one.

Let another man praise thee, and not thine own mouth; a stranger, and not thine own lips ( Proverbs 27:2 ).

Don't go around praising yourself.

A stone is heavy, the sand weighty; but a fool's wrath is heavier than them both. Wrath is cruel, and anger is outrageous; but who is able to stand before envy? ( Proverbs 27:3-4 )

Now wrath is cruel enough. Anger is outrageous. But man, someone who's envious, how, who can stand before him? How totally devastating envy can be.

Open rebuke is better than secret love ( Proverbs 27:5 ).

And this next one also. So powerful.

Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of the enemy are deceitful ( Proverbs 27:6 ).

"Faithful are the wounds of a friend."

The full soul loatheth a honeycomb ( Proverbs 27:7 );

You know, if you're full even something as sweet as honey just is... I'm so full I don't want anything.

but to the hungry soul every bitter thing is sweet. As a bird that wandereth from her nest, so is a man that wandereth from his place. Ointment and perfume rejoice the heart: and so doth the sweetness of a man's friend by hearty counsel ( Proverbs 27:7-9 ).

Oh, how great it is to have a friend who will come in and give you honest counsel. There are many people who ostensibly seek counseling. That is what they are ostensibly seeking. But in reality they are not seeking counsel. They say they are seeking counsel. They come and say, "Oh, I want to talk to a counselor." Under the guise of desiring to be counseled. But in reality, they don't want counsel.

Quite often I have people come to me, and they say, "Oh, I need to talk to you." And I try to explain to them that I have very little time that isn't taken up with something. You see, in the early church they had problems that rose as the church began to grow. Because the people were bringing their complaints to the apostles and they were saying, "Our widows who are following the Hellenistic culture are being discriminated against by the men who are distributing the church's welfare program." And the pressure was to get Peter and John and those guys to come and to stand there as the widows would come in and apportion them out so that the thing would be equal.

And so the elders said, "Hey, let's appoint men that are filled with the Holy Spirit, men of good report, men who are honest, to oversee this distribution of the church's welfare in order that we might give ourselves continually to the Word of God and to prayer." So they appointed godly men, Stephen, Philip and others, to oversee the distribution of the church's welfare program in order that they might be free to do the things that God had called them to do. That is, of waiting upon the Lord in prayer, in the study of the Word, that they might be able to instruct the whole body of Christ.

Now it is wonderful that here at Calvary Chapel we've been able to establish priorities. And in the establishing of the priorities, God really hasn't called me as a counselor. He hasn't gifted me as a counselor. I don't have the patience to be a counselor, nor do I have enough understanding. God has called me to minister the Word. It would be very easy, the pressure is on me to fill up my whole calendar from nine o'clock Monday morning till eight o'clock Friday night solid with counseling appointments one after another. There are that many people who call who need to talk to me. It's urgent. It's desperate. So that I would have absolutely no time for my family, no time for the Word of God, no time for prayer, no time for waiting upon the Lord, so that when I stood up in front of you, I'd have nothing to say.

So God has established the various priorities. And people sometimes they'll come to me, "Oh, I need to talk to you." Well, we have counselors here at the church. "Oh, well, I talked to them." Wait a minute. If you talked to them, then why do you want to talk to me? Probably because they didn't agree with what you wanted to hear, you know. They didn't say the things you want to hear. So you're hoping to find someone that's going to say the thing that you want to hear. Well, that isn't true counseling. And you're not really seeking counsel if you're only seeking confirmation for the dumb things you want to do. You're not really looking for counsel, you see.

And so many people who ostensibly are seeking counsel are only seeking confirmation in the actions that they have decided upon. They really don't want real counsel as such. Yet hearty counsel is a wonderful thing. It's like perfume.

Thine own friend [verse Proverbs 27:10 ], thy father's friend, forsake not; neither go to thy brother's house in the day of your calamity: for better is a neighbor that is near than a brother that is far off ( Proverbs 27:10 ).

Now this assumes, of course, that your brother is way down some place and better to just go to a neighbor or to a friend for help than go across to the country to your brother. Neighbor that is near is better than a brother that is far off.

My son, be wise, and make my heart glad, that I may answer him that reproaches me. A prudent man foresees the evil, and hides himself; but the simple pass on, and are punished ( Proverbs 27:11-12 ).

We had basically the same thing in the twenty-second. But you remember these are proverbs that were gathered together by Hezekiah's men, and in gathering them they did repeat some that were declared earlier.

Take his garment that is surety for a stranger, and take a pledge of him for a strange woman ( Proverbs 27:13 ).

That also was an earlier Proverbs 20:16 .

He that blesseth his friend with a loud voice, rising early in the morning, it shall be counted a curse to him ( Proverbs 27:14 ).

That is the guy that's still in the sack, man. I don't want any blessings at five in the morning, you know. "I just called you up to give you a blessing, brother." Well.

In Bible college we used to have a guy that roomed in the room next to mine. And he won some kind of contest in Los Angeles years ago, a singing contest, and won a scholarship to some voice school to train him for opera. And so he was always using his operatic voice. And he had some peculiar idiosyncrasies beside that. And we used to give him this proverb because he would wake up early and decide to storm heaven with his prayers and just so loud. He was so loud; you can't believe how loud. This guy did have a voice. I mean, he was loud. And used to always, "Well, bless the Lord." Just really put the whole thing into it. So. You do that early in the morning and it really doesn't come across as a blessing. It comes across as a curse.

A continual dropping in a rainy day is like a contentious woman ( Proverbs 27:15 ).

It could be irritating and annoying, I would imagine.

Whosoever hideth her hideth the wind ( Proverbs 27:16 ),

That would be the contentious woman.

and the ointment of his right hand, which bewrayeth itself. Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend ( Proverbs 27:16-17 ).

We sharpen each other.

Whoso keepeth the fig tree shall eat the fruit thereof: so he that waiteth on his master shall be honored. As in water face answereth to face, so the heart of man to man ( Proverbs 27:18-19 ).

Like looking into a clear pool of water and seeing your reflection.

Hell and destruction are never full; so the eyes of man are never satisfied ( Proverbs 27:20 ).

Very important proverb. "Hell and destruction never full, the eyes of a man." If a man is bent towards chasing, bent towards running around, he'll never be satisfied. His eyes are never satisfied. Always looking for a new conquest. Never satisfied.

As the fining pot for silver, and the furnace for gold; so is a man to his praise. And though thou shouldest pound a fool in a mortar among wheat with a pestle, yet will not his foolishness depart from him ( Proverbs 27:21-22 ).

Can't beat it out of him.

Now the next five are coupled together.

Be thou diligent to know the state of thy flocks, and look well to thy herds: For riches are not for ever: and doth the crown endure to every generation? The hay appeareth, and the tender grass showeth itself, and herbs of the mountains are gathered. The lambs are for thy clothing, the goats are the price of the field. And thou shalt have goats' milk enough for thy food, for the food of thy household, and for the maintenance of thy maidens ( Proverbs 27:23-27 ).

So the idea is diligence in looking over your own welfare, keeping your own flocks and herds. "

Dr. Constable's Expository Notes

3. Virtues and vices 27:1-22

Many of the analogies in this pericope deal with virtues and vices that are characteristic of the wise and the foolish.

Dr. Constable's Expository Notes

The first statement makes the point of the proverb: friends are important allies that we should retain if possible (Proverbs 27:10 a). The second statement is not as clear. The thought seems to be, "Do not go all the way to your blood brother’s house in a crisis if he lives far from you." The third statement gives the reason for the second. A friend nearby who is not a blood relative can be of more help than a close relation who lives farther away. A friend nearby should be more advantageous than a brother who lives miles away.

Gill's Exposition of the Whole Bible

Thine own friend, and thy father's friend forsake not,.... Who have been long tried and proved, and found faithful; these should be kept to and valued, and not new ones sought; which to do is oftentimes of bad consequence. Solomon valued his father's friend Hiram, and kept up friendship with him; but Rehoboam his son forsook the counsel of the old men his father's friends and counsellors, and followed the young mien his new friends, and thereby lost ten tribes at once. Jarchi interprets this of God, the friend of Israel and of their fathers, who is not to be forsaken, and is a friend that loves at all times; and to forsake him is to forsake the fountain of living waters;

neither go into thy brother's house in the day of thy calamity; poverty and distress, to tell him thy case, expecting sympathy relief, and succour from him; but rather go to thy friend and father's friend, who sticks closer than a brother; see Proverbs 18:24;

[for] better is a neighbour [that is] near than a brother far off: a neighbour that is a fast and faithful friend, and who is not only near as to place but as to affections is more serviceable and, useful to a man in time of distress than a brother though near in blood, yet as far off in place, so much more in affection, and from whom a man can promise nothing, and little is to be expected. The phrase in the preceding clause signifies a cloudy day, and such a day of distress through poverty is; in which sense it is used by Latin e writers, when a man is alone, and former friends care not to come nigh him.

e "Tempora si fuerunt nubila, solus eris", Ovid. Trist. 1. Eleg. 8.

Henry's Complete Commentary on the Bible

      9 Ointment and perfume rejoice the heart: so doth the sweetness of a man's friend by hearty counsel.   10 Thine own friend, and thy father's friend, forsake not; neither go into thy brother's house in the day of thy calamity: for better is a neighbour that is near than a brother far off.

      Here is, 1. A charge given to be faithful and constant to our friends, our old friends, to keep up an intimacy with them, and to be ready to do them all the offices that lie in our power. It is good to have a friend, a bosom-friend, whom we can be free with, and with whom we may communicate counsels. It is not necessary that this friend should be a relation, or any way akin to us, though it is happiest when, among those who are so, we find one fit to make a friend of. Peter and Andrew were brethren, so were James and John; yet Solomon frequently distinguishes between a friend and a brother. But it is advisable to choose a friend among our neighbours who live near us, that acquaintance may be kept up and kindnesses the more frequently interchanged. It is good also to have a special respect to those who have been friends to our family: "Thy own friend, especially if he have been thy father's friend, forsake not; fail not both to serve him and to use him, as there is occasion. He is a tried friend; he knows thy affairs; he has a particular concern for thee; therefore be advised by him." It is a duty we owe to our parents, when they are gone, to love their friends and consult with them. Solomon's son undid himself by forsaking the counsel of his father's friends. 2. A good reason given why we should thus value true friendship and be choice of it. (1.) Because of the pleasure of it. There is a great deal of sweetness in conversing and consulting with a cordial friend. It is like ointment and perfume, which are very grateful to the smell, and exhilarate the spirits. It rejoices the heart; the burden of care is made lighter by unbosoming ourselves to our friend, and it is a great satisfaction to us to have his sentiments concerning our affairs. The sweetness of friendship lies not in hearty mirth, and hearty laughter, but in hearty counsel, faithful advice, sincerely given and without flattery, by counsel of the soul (so the word is), counsel which reaches the case, and comes to the heart, counsel about soul-concerns, Psalms 66:16. We should reckon that the most pleasant conversation which is about spiritual things, and promotes the prosperity of the soul. (2.) Because of the profit and advantage of it, especially in a day of calamity. We are here advised not to go into a brother's house, not to expect relief from a kinsman merely for kindred-sake, for the obligation of that commonly goes little further than calling cousin and fails when it comes to the trial of a real kindness, but rather to apply ourselves to our neighbours, who are at hand, and will be ready to help us at an exigence. It is wisdom to oblige them by being neighbourly, and we shall have the benefit of it in distress, by finding them so to us, Proverbs 18:24; Proverbs 18:24.

Spurgeon's Verse Expositions of the Bible

The Best Friend

A Sermon (No. 2627) intended for reading on Lord’s Day, June 18th, 1899, delivered by C. H. Spurgeon at the Metropolitan Tabernacle, Newington on Thursday evening, February 23rd, 1882.

“ Thine own friend, and thy father’s friend, forsake not.” Proverbs 27:10 .

True friends are very scarce. We have a great many acquaintances and sometimes we call them friends, and so misuse the noble word “friendship.” Peradventure in some after-day of adversity when these so-called friends have looked out for their own interests and left us to do the best we can for ourselves, that word friendship may come back to us with sad and sorrowful associations. The friend in need is the friend indeed, and such friends I say again, are scarce. When thou hast found such a man, and proved the sincerity of his friendship; when he has been faithful to thy father and to thee, grapple him to thyself with hooks of steel and never let him go. It may be that because he is a faithful friend he will sometimes vex thee and anger thee. See how Solomon puts it in this very chapter: “Open rebuke is better than secret love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend.” It takes a great deal of friendship to be able to tell a man of his faults. It is no friendship that flatters; it is small friendship that holds its tongue when it ought to speak; but it is true friendship that can speak at the right time and if need be even speak so sharply as to cause a wound. If thou art like many other foolish ones, thou wilt be angry with the man who is so much thy friend that he will tell thee the truth. If thou art unworthy of thy friend, thou wilt begin to grow weary of him when he is performing on thy behalf the most heroic act of pure charity by warning thee of thy danger, and reminding thee of thine imperfection. Solomon, in prospect of such a case, knowing that this is one of the greatest trials of friendship among such poor imperfect beings as we are, tells us not to forsake for this reason nor indeed for any other reason the man who has been to us and to our family a true friend: “Thine own friend, and thy father’s friend, forsake not.”

I do not think that I should waste your time if I were to give you a lecture upon friendship its duties, its dangers, its rights, and its privileges; but it is not my intention to do so. There is one Friend to whom these words of Solomon are specially applicable, there is a Friend who is the chief and highest of all friends; and when I speak of him I feel that I am not spiritualizing the text in the least. He is a true and real Friend, and these words are truly and really applicable to him; and if ever the text is emphatic it is so when it is applied to him, for there was never such another friend to us and to our fathers; there is no friend to whom we ought to be so intensely attached as to him: “Thine own friend, and thy father’s friend, forsake not.”

I want under the guidance of the Holy Spirit to speak upon this subject thus; First here is a descriptive title which may be fitly applied to Christ by very many of us; he is our own Friend and also our father’s Friend. Secondly here is suggestive advice concerning this Friend: “Forsake him not.” And ere I have done I shall say a little upon a consequent resolution . I hope that we shall turn the text into a solemn resolve and say, “My own Friend, and my father’s Friend, I will not forsake.”

I. First then here is a descriptive title for our blessed Lord and Master.

First, he is a Friend , the Friend of man. I know that Young calls him the “great Philanthropist.” I do not care to see that title used just so; it is not good enough for him, though truly the great Lover of man is Christ. Better still is the title which was given to him when he was upon earth, “the friend of sinners.”

Friend of sinners, is his name.

Their Friend thinking of them with love when no other eye pitied them and no other heart seemed to care for them. Their Friend, entering with tenderest sympathy into the case of the lost, for “the Son of man came to seek and to save that which was lost.” Their Friend giving them good and sound advice and wholesome counsel, for whosoever listens to the words of Christ shall find in his teaching and in his guidance the highest wisdom. Their Friend, giving far more than sympathy and mere words however giving a lifetime of holy service for the sake of those whose cause he had espoused, and going further even than this, doing for them the utmost that a friend can do, for what is there more than that a man should lay down his life for his friend? Friend of man, and therefore born of man, Friend of sinners, and therefore living among them and ministering to them. Friend of sinners, and therefore taking their sin upon himself and bearing it “in his own body on the tree,” so fulfilling Gabriel’s prophecy that he would come “to finish the transgression and to make an end of sins, and to make reconciliation for iniquity, and to bring in everlasting righteousness.”

Christ has done for us all that needed to be done. He has done much more than we ever could have asked him to do or expected him to do. He has done more for us than we can understand even now that he has done it, and more than you and I are likely ever to understand even when our intellect shall have been developed and enlarged to the utmost degree before the eternal throne, for even there I do not think we shall ever fully know how much we owe to the friendship of our best Friend. However self-denying and tender other fiends may be, our Lord must ever stand at the head of the list, and we will not put a second there as worthy of any comparison with him.

Next, it is a very blessed thing to have the Lord Jesus Christ as having been our father’s friend . There are some of us to whom this has been literally true for many generations. I suppose that there is some pride in being the fourteenth earl, or the tenth duke, or having a certain rank among men; but sometimes quietly to myself I glory in my pedigree, because I can trace the line of spiritual grace back as far as I can go to men who loved the Lord, and who, many of them, have preached his Word. Many of you I know in this church and in other churches have a glorious heraldry in the line of the Lord’s nobles. It is true that some of you have had the great mercy of being taken like trees out of the desert and planted in the courts of our God, for which you may well be glad; but others of you are slips from vines that in their turn were slips from other vines, loved and cared for by the great Husbandman. You cannot tell how long this blessed succession has continued; your fathers and your fathers’ fathers as far back as you can trace them were friends of Christ. Happy Ephraim, whose father Joseph had God with him! Happy Joseph, whose father Jacob saw God at Bethel! Happy Jacob, whose father Isaac walked in the fields and meditated in communion with Jehovah! Happy Isaac, whose father Abraham had spoken with God and was called “the friend of God.” God has a habit of loving families; David said “The mercy of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting upon them that fear him, and his righteousness unto children’s children; to such as keep his covenant and to those that remember his commandments to do them.” Grace does not run in the blood, but often the stream of divine mercy has run side by side with it, and instead of the fathers have been the children whom the Lord has made to be princes in the earth.

Some of you perhaps have fathers and mothers still living whose example you may fitly follow; I charge you never forsake your father’s God, or what is tenderer still, the God of your mother. Others of you have parents in heaven; well, they are still yours; that sacred relationship is not broken. You remember your mother’s last grasp of your hand when she bade you follow her to heaven; you recollect your father’s appeals to you in his long sickness when he pleaded with you to take heed to your ways and not neglect the things of God but seek him in the days of your youth. Well, did you ever hear your father say anything against his God? Did your mother ever in her confiding moments whisper in your ear, “Mary, do not trust in God for he has betrayed your mother’s confidence”? No, I know they did not talk like that, for he was their best friend; and he who was such a Friend to the dear old man whom you can never forget, he who cheered the heart of that gracious matron whose sweet face rises before you now oh, I beseech you, forsake him not! “Thine own friend, and thy father’s friend, forsake not.”

Still, the sweetest part of the text lies in these words, “Thine own friend.” I do not think that I can preach on those words; I can take them in my mouth and they are like honey for sweetness, but they must be personally enjoyed to be fully appreciated. There are some precious lines we sometimes sing,

The health is of my countenance,

Yes, mine own God is he;

which exactly describes the blessedness of “thine own friend.”

Now if it be true that Christ is thine own Friend then thou hast spoken with him, thou hast held sweet converse with him, thou hast placed thy confidence in him, thou hast told him thy lost estate and sinfulness, and thou hast reposed in him as thine own Savior. Thou hast put thy cause into his hands, and thou hast left it there. If he be indeed thine own Friend, then he has helped thee. Thou wast a stranger and he has taken thee in; thou wast naked and he has clothed thee; thou wast spiritually sick and in prison and he came to thee and healed thee. Yea, and he wore thy chains and bade thee go free; and he took thy sicknesses and bade thee take his health, and so he made thee whole. Ay, and he restored thee even from the grave, and went into that grave himself, that by his death thou mightest live. Thou knowest that it is so, and day by day thou dost keep up communion with him; thou couldst not live without him, for he is such a Friend to thee, and thou dost rest on him with all thy weight as thou comest up from the wilderness with him, leaning on thy Beloved, “thine own friend.”

Nor is the friendship all on one side, though thy side is a very little one. Thou wouldst make it greater if it were in thy power, for thou hast confessed his name, thou hast united thyself with his people, thou lovest to join with them in prayer and praise. Thou art not ashamed to be called by Christ’s name as a Christian, or to speak well of that name, and thou desirest to consecrate to him all that thou hast. Better than all this, while thou dost call him Friend he also calls thee friend, as he said to his disciples, “Ye are my friends if ye do whatsoever I command you.” Dare I say the words, yet dare I doubt the truth of the words Jesus is my Friend? There is one we read of in the Bible who was David’s captain of the host, and there was another who was David’s counselor, but there was one man whom we always call “David’s friend, Jonathan;” and I envy him such a title. Yet Jesus gives this name to all those who come and put their trust in him, and so find him to be their Friend.

Now inasmuch as the Lord Jesus is “thine own friend and thy father’s friend,” the injunction of the text comes to thee with peculiar force: “Forsake him not.” Canst thou forsake him? Look at his face all red with bloody sweat for thee; nor his face alone, for he is covered all over with that gory robe wherein he wrought out thy redemption. He that works for bread must sweat, but he that worked for thine eternal life did sweat great drops of blood falling down to the ground. Canst thou forsake him? He stands at Pilate’s bar, he is mocked by Herod’s men of war, he is scourged by Pilate, and all for thee; and canst thou forsake him? He goes up to the cross of Calvary and the cruel iron is driven through his hands and feet, and there he makes expiation for thy guilt; he is thy Friend even to the ignominy of a felon’s death, and canst thou forsake him? He lays his pierced hand on thee and he says, “Wilt thou also go away?” or as he worded it to the twelve, “Ye also will not go away, will you?” So it might be read: “Many of my supposed friends have gone, and so have proved themselves to be not friends but traitors; but ye also will not go away, will you?” And he seems to make an appeal to them with those tearful tender eyes of his “as the eyes of doves by the rivers of waters, washed with milk, and fitly set,” “Ye also will not go away, will you?”

And when you turn your eye another way and think not merely of the shame your Friend endured for you, but recollect what is an equal proof of his love, that he is not ashamed of you now that he is in his glory; that amidst the throng of angels and cherubim and seraphim that frequent his courts above, he does not disdain to know that he is the brother of these poor earth-worms down below, for even there he wears the body which proves him to be our next of kin ay, and wears the scars which proved that for us he endured the death-penalty itself, and even now he is not ashamed to call us brethren; as you think of all this can you forsake him? Because you are somewhat better off than you once were, will you leave the little gathering of poor folk with whom you used to worship so happily, and will you go to some more fashionable place where there is music, but little of the music of the name of Jesus where there is gorgeous architecture it may be, and masquerading, and mummery, and I know not what, but little of the sweet savor of his presence and the dropping of that dew which he always brings with him wherever he comes? Oh, it is a pity, it is a sorrowful pity, it is a meanness that would disgrace a mere worldling, when a man who once confessed Christ and followed him must needs turn his back upon his Lord because his own coat is made of better material than it used to be, and his balance at the bank is heavier! I had almost said Then let the Judas go, be his own place what it may it were almost a dishonor to Christ to wish the traitor back. Oh, will ye go away either from the Crucified or from the Glorified, for if ye will forsake this Friend, “Behold, he cometh!” Every hour brings him nearer; the chariots of his glory have glowing axles, and you may almost hear them as they speed toward us; and then what will you do when you have forsaken your own Friend and your father’s Friend and you hear him say, “I never knew you; I never knew you”? God grant that it may never be the lot of any of us here present to hear those awful words!

II. Now I pass on to our second head as the Holy Spirit may help me; it is suggested advice : “Thine own friend, and thy father’s friend, forsake not.”

There is to me in the text a suggestion which the text itself does not suggest; that is to say, it suggests something by not suggesting it . The text does not suggest to me that my own Friend and my father’s Friend will ever forsake me. It seems to hint that I may forsake him, but it does not suggest that he will ever forsake me and he never will do so. If the Lord had ever meant to forsake me he has had so many good reasons for doing it that he would have done it long ago. The apostle says of those who are journeying to the better country, that “if they had been mindful of that country from whence they came out, they might have had opportunity to have returned,” and certainly our blessed Lord and Master, if he had desired to leave us to perish, had many an opportunity to return to heaven before he died; and since then he has had many occasions when he might have said “I really must withdraw my friendship from you,” if he had ever wished to do so. But his love is constant to its line: “Having loved his own which were in the world, he loved them unto the end.” His is a friendship which never changes. You shall never fall back on him and find that he has withdrawn the arm with which he formerly upheld you. You shall find in life and in death that “there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.” Let us be cheered by the assurance that he will never forsake us.

Now let us go on to what the text does suggest in so many words: it suggests to us the question, in what sense can we forsake Christ? Well, there is more than one sense in which a man may forsake Christ. Two passages rise to my mind at this moment: “Then all the disciples forsook him and fled.” That was one sort of forsaking; they were all afraid and ran away from their Lord in the hour of his betrayal into the hands of sinners; but it is quite another kind of forsaking when we read: “From that time many of his disciples went back and walked no more with him.” The first forsaking was the result of a sudden fear, much to be deplored and very blameworthy, but still only temporary in its effects; the other was the deliberate act of those who in cool blood refused to accept Jesus Christ’s doctrine or to follow him any farther, and so turned back and walked no more with him. This last forsaking is incurable. The former one was cured almost as soon as the sudden fear that caused it was removed, for we find John and even Peter following the Master to the judgment hall, and the whole of the disciples soon gathered around him after his resurrection. I would say to you dear friend, “Thine own friend, and thy father’s friend forsake not” in any sense at all. Forsake him not even in thy moments of alarm. Pray God then that thou mayest play the man and not forsake him and flee. And then in the other sense, let no quarrel ever arise between you and Christ’s most precious truth, so as to lead you deliberately to leave him, for this is the worst of all kinds of forsaking. If we never forsake him in any sense at all, then it is quite certain that we shall never forsake him in the worst sense. I remember a little merriment I had with a good Wesleyan brother, the clerk of the works, when the Tabernacle was being built. He wanted me to go up a ladder right into those lantern lights, and I said “No, thank you, I would rather not.” “But” he replied, “I thought you had no fear of falling.” “Yes” I answered, “that is quite true, I have no fear of finally falling away; but the belief that the Lord will preserve me does not exercise any evil influence over me, for it keeps me from running unnecessary risks by climbing up ladders; but you good brethren who are so afraid of falling do not seem to show it practically in your conduct, for you go up and down the ladders as nimbly as possible.” I have sometimes met with persons who think that if we believe that we shall never fall so as to perish, we are apt to become presumptuous; but we do not, dear brethren. There are other truths that come in to balance this one, so that what they think might come of it is by God’s good grace prevented; and I am not quite sure that those who think that they may finally fall and perish are sufficiently impressed with that belief so as to be always careful. The fact is that your carefulness of walk does not depend merely upon your view of this doctrine or that; but it depends upon your state of heart and a great many other things besides, so that you have no reason to judge what you might do if you believed such-and-such a truth, because if you did believe it perhaps you would at the same time be a better man, and the possibility that appears to linger around the doctrine would vanish so far as you are concerned. Let this be the language of all of us who love the Lord as we look up confidently and reverently to him,

We have no fear that thou shouldst lose

One whom eternal love could choose;

But we would ne’er this grace abuse,

Let us not fall, Let us not fall.

I know that if we are truly the Lord’s he will not suffer us to forsake him; but I must have a wholesome fear lest I should forsake him, for who am I that I should be sure that I have not deceived myself? And I may have done so; and after all, may forsake him after the loudest professions and even after the greatest apparent sincerity in avowing that I never will turn away from him.

So I ask again in what sense can we forsake our Lord? Well, there are many senses, but perhaps you will see better what I mean if I describe a general process of forsaking a friend. I hope that you have never had to undergo it; I do not know that I ever had; but still I can imagine that it is something like this. The old gentleman was your father’s friend, he also had been your own friend and has done you many a good turn; but at last he has said something which has provoked you to anger, or he has done something which you have misunderstood or misinterpreted; and now you feel very cool towards him when you meet. You pass the time of day and perhaps say very much the same things which you used to say, but they are said in a very different fashion. Now that is how we begin to forsake our God; we may keep up the appearance of friendship with Christ, but it is a very cool affair. We go to a place of worship but there is no enjoyment, no enthusiasm, no earnestness. Then the next thing is that you do not call to see your friend as frequently as you used to do. It has not come to an open rupture between you, so you do look in at certain set times when you are expected, but there are none of those little flying visits and that popping in upon him unawares, just to get a look at his face as you used to do. And on his part he does not come to see you much. And that is how our forsaking of Christ generally continues. We do not go to talk with him as we once did, and when we do go to his house we find that he is not at home. “Can two walk together except they be agreed?” Then by-and-by perhaps there is a sharp word spoken, and your friend feels that you do not want him. You have said something that cuts him to the quick and grieves him. It was not anything so very bad if it had been spoken to a stranger; but to be said to him who was your father’s friend, to him whom you always expected to come in and whom you loved to see to say it to him was very hard and he naturally took umbrage at it. That is how it comes to pass between Christ and professors. There is something done which might not be of so much account in the case of nonprofessors or the openly ungodly; but it is very bad in one who professed to have Christ for his Friend. And do you know what happens by-and-by when your friend is being discarded? At last he does not call at all and you do not go to see him. Perhaps the breach is still further widened and little presents are sent back or treated with contempt. There is that oil painting which your father would have, though he could scarcely afford it, because he loved his friend so much, and which he hung up in so conspicuous a place in his house; well, the other day the string broke and you did not buy a fresh piece of cord to hang it up again; in fact, you put the picture away in the lumber-room and you really do not care what becomes of it. The little tokens of past affection are all put away for there is an open rupture now; and when somebody spoke to you about him lately you said, “Oh, pray don’t mention him to me! He is no friend of mine now. I used to be on intimate terms with him once, but I have altered my opinion about him altogether.” So do some professors act towards the Lord Jesus Christ. Those little tokens of love which they thought they had from him they send back. They do not remain in fellowship with his Church. They do all that they possibly can to disown him. In the meanwhile the blessed Lord of love is obliged to disown them too; and his Church disowns them; and by-and-by the rupture has become complete. May that never be the portion of any of you!

“No,” says one, “it never will be.” My dear friend, if you are so confident as that you are the person about whom I am most afraid. I recollect one who used to pray among us but we had to put him out of the church for evil living; and there was one of our members who said that night, “If that man is not a child of God I am not one myself.” I said “My dear brother, do not talk like that. I would not pit my soul against the soul of any man, for I do know a little of myself, but I do not know other men as well as I know myself.” I am very much afraid that neither of the two men I have mentioned was a child of God; by their speech they seemed to be Christians, but their acts were not like those of God’s people. It does not do for us to talk as that man did but to pray to the Lord, “Hold thou me up and I shall be safe.” That is the proper prayer for us; or else it may happen even to us as happened to them, and we may forsake our own Friend and our father’s Friend.

Now what reasons can we possibly have for forsaking Christ? We ought to do nothing for which we cannot give good reasons. I have known persons very properly forsake their former friends because they have themselves become new creatures in Christ Jesus, and they have rightly and wisely given up the acquaintances with whom they used to sin. They cannot go now to the house where everything is contrary to their feelings. But it is not so with Christ. Some so called friends drag a man down, lower him, injure him, impose upon him, and at last he is obliged to let them go; but we cannot say that of Christ. His friendship has drawn us up, helped us, sanctified us, elevated us; we owe everything to that friendship. We cannot have a reason therefore for forsaking this Friend. I have known some to outgrow an acquaintance or friend. They really have not been able to continue to have common views and sympathies, for while their friend has remained in the mire they have risen into quite different men by reason of education and other influences; but we can never outgrow Christ. That is not possible; and the more we grow in a right sense, the more we shall become like him. A man who has been the friend of our father and of ourselves is the very man to have still as a friend, because he probably understands all about the family difficulties and the family troubles, and he also understands us. Why, he nursed us when we were children and therefore he knows most about us. I remember that when lying sore sick, I had a letter from a kind old gentleman who said that he had that day celebrated his eightieth birthday, and the choicest friend he had at his dinner table was the old family doctor. He said, “He has attended to me so long that he thoroughly knows my constitution, he is nearly as old as myself; but the first time I was ill I had him, and he has attended me now for forty years. Once” he said, “when I had a severe attack of gout, I was tempted to try some very famous man who very nearly killed me; and until I got back to my old friend I never was really well again.” So he wrote to advise me to get some really good physician, and let him know my constitution, and to stick to him and never go off to any of the patent medicines or the quacks of the day. Oh, but there is a great deal of truth in that in a spiritual sense! With the utmost reverence we may say that the Lord Jesus Christ has been our family Physician. Did he not attend my father in all his sicknesses, and my grandfather too? And he knows the ins and outs of my constitution; he knows my ways good and bad, and all my sorrows; and therefore I do not go to anyone else for relief; and I advise you also to keep to Jesus Christ, do not forsake him. If you ever are tempted to go aside even for a little while, I pray that you may have grace enough to come back quickly, and to commit yourself again to him, and never go astray again. There is the blessing of having one who is wise, one who is tried, one whose sympathy has been tested, one who has become, as it were, one of your family, one who has taken your whole household to his heart and made it part and parcel of himself. Such a Friend to your own soul and to your father’s soul forsake not.

Do not forsake him, dear friends, because I almost tremble to say it you will want him some day . Even if you would never need him in the future, you ought not to forsake him. I do not quite like that verse of the hymn at the end of our hymn-book

Ashamed of Jesus! yes, I may,

When I’ve no guilt to wash away;

No tear to wipe, no good to crave,

No fears to quell, no soul to save.

No, I may not ; when all my guilt is gone I shall not be ashamed of Jesus. When I am in heaven and need no more the pardon of sin, I certainly shall not be ashamed of him who brought me there; no, but I shall glory in him more than ever. Your friendship to Christ, and mine, ought not to depend upon what we are going to get out of him. We must love him now for what he is, for all that he has already done, and for his own blessed person and personal beauties which every day should hold fast our love and bind us in chains of affection to him.

But suppose you do think of forsaking Christ, where are you going to get another friend to take his place? You must have a friend of some sort; who is going to sit in Christ’s chair? Whose portrait is to be hung up in the old familiar place when the old Friend is discarded? To whom are you going to tell your griefs, and from whom will you expect to receive help in time of need? Who will be with you in sickness? Who will be with you in the hour of death? Ah! there is no other who can ever fill the vacuum which the absence of Christ would make. Therefore, never forsake him.

III. Now I must close with the consequent resolve about which I can say very little, as my time has gone.

Let this be your resolve by his grace, instead of forsaking him you will cling to him more closely than ever ; you will own him when it brings you dishonor to do so; you will trust him when he wounds you, for “faithful are the wounds of a friend;” you will serve him when it is costly to do it, when it involves self-denial; resolved that by the help of his ever-blessed Spirit without whom you can do nothing, you will never in any sort of company conceal the fact that you are a Christian. Never under any possible circumstances wish to be otherwise than a servant of such a Master, a friend of such a Lord. Come now dear young friends who are getting cool towards Christ, and elder friends to whom religion is becoming monotonous, come to your Lord once more and ask him to bind you with cords, even with cords to the horns of the altar. You have had time to count the cost of all Egypt’s treasure; forego it and forswear it once for all. But the riches of Christ you can never count; so come and take him again to be your All-in-all.

Those about to be baptized will feel I trust as we shall when we look on and say each man and woman for himself or herself

‘Tis done! The great transaction’s done:

I am my Lord’s, and he is mine.

Nail your colors to the mast. Bear in your body the marks of the Lord Jesus. Ay, let everyone of us who has been baptized into Christ feel that our whole body bears the water-mark, for we have been “buried with him by baptism into death.” It was not for the putting off of the filthiness of the flesh, but as a declaration that we were dead to the world and quickened into newness of life in Christ Jesus our Savior. So let it be with you too, dear friends, as you follow your Lord through the water; cling to him, cleave to him: “Thine own friend and thy father’s friend, forsake not.” May God add his blessing for our Lord Jesus Christ’s sake! Amen.