Bible Commentaries
Philemon

INTRODUCTION TO PHILEMON

Paul may have written many private letters during his long life, but only one has come down to us, and that one is very brief and weighty. It was addressed to Philemon at Colosse, one who had become obedient to the faith through the labors of Paul. He was a zealous Christian, in whose house the church met. The Epistle was written and sent at the same time as that to the Colossians.

It was a letter of commendation of a slave of Philemon, who had run away from his master on account of some offense which he had committed. By some means he fell under the influence of Paul in Rome, who taught him the gospel, to which he became obedient, and then desired to return to his master.

The Epistle is purely personal, yet very significant. Paul omits his usual introductory words—“an apostle of Jesus Christ”—and substitutes the touching designation, “a prisoner of Jesus Christ,” thereby going directly to the heart of his beloved friend and brother in Christ.

The Epistle introduces us into a Christian household con­sisting of father (Philemon), mother (Apphia), and son (Archippus), who was at the same time a fellow soldier, a Christian minister, and a slave (Onesimus). This shows the effect of Christianity upon society at a crucial point where heathenism was utterly helpless. It touches on the institution of slavery, which lay like an incubus upon the whole heathen world, and was interwoven into the whole structure of do­mestic and public life.

The effect of the gospel upon this gigantic social evil is that of a peaceful and gradual cure from within, by teaching the common origin and equality of human beings, their common redemption and Christian brotherhood, by emancipation of them from slavery unto spiritual freedom, equality and brother­hood in Christ where “there can be neither Jew nor Greek, there can be neither bond nor free, there can be no male and female; for ye all are one man in Christ Jesus.” (Galatians 3:28.) This principle and the corresponding practice wrought first an amelioration and ultimately the abolition of slavery. The

process was very slow and retarded by the counteracting influence of love of gain and power and all the sinful passions of men; but it was sure and is now almost, if not complete, throughout the Christian world, while paganism and Mo­hammedanism regards slavery as a normal state of society, and hence do not make even an attempt to remove it. It was the only wise way to follow in dealing with the subject. A proc­lamation of emancipation from them would have resulted in a bloody revolution in which Christianity itself would have been buried.

Paul accordingly sent back Onesimus to his rightful master, yet under a new character, no more a contemptible thief and runaway, but a new man in Christ Jesus and a beloved brother, with a touching request that Philemon might receive him as kindly as he would Paul himself, yea as his own heart. (16, 17.) Such advice took the sting out of slavery; the form remained; the thing was gone. What a contrast! In the eyes of the heathen philosophers, Onesimus, like every other slave, was but a chattel; in the eyes of Paul, a redeemed child of God and an heir of eternal life which is far better than freedom.

This Epistle was written from Rome some time in the year 62 at about the same time that Ephesians and Colossians were written.

The Need For Forgiveness

Philemon 1:2-20

The book of Philemon is a personal letter written to a slave owner named Philemon who has a runaway slave named Onesimus, whom Paul is sending back to Philemon. Because this is the purpose of the book, Philemon is an often skipped book. A letter to a slave owner about a runaway slave. Does this book have anything for us? Can this book be useful to us? There are a couple of reasons for us to study this book and recognize that it can be useful for us today. First, this personal letter was kept by God as scripture for us today. Second, notice that this book was not written to Philemon alone, as we might assume. Carefully read Philemon 1:2 and you will see that not only is this letter written to Philemon, but also Apphia, Archippus, and the church in your house. This letter was read to the church. So, though this situation is a personal matter regarding Philemon and Onesimus, its message is important and practical for us today. When we study this short letter we will see that this is a letter devoted to forgiveness. We live in an ego-centered, selfish society that knows and cares little about forgiveness. Therefore, the message in this book is needed to be heard and learned today. There are two main points that Paul makes in this letter to Philemon: the need to forgive and how to forgive. In this lesson we will talk about the need to forgive and in our next lesson we will talk about how to forgive. As we read this letter, think about how Paul, who is a prisoner in Rome (verse 1), speaks to Philemon about forgiveness.

The Character of the Christian

Philemon 1:4-7 is Paul’s thanksgiving for Philemon and all that Philemon has done in the faith. Paul says that he has heard of Philemon’s love and faith that he has toward Jesus and for all the saints. Paul is laying the groundwork in the thanksgiving section of the letter. Paul is thankful to God that Philemon is doing what Christians are supposed to do. Christians are to show love and faith, not only toward Jesus, but for all the saints. Philemon, you are showing love and faith for all of God’s people. You love and show faith in all the believers. This is Christian character: love and faith toward other Christians.

Notice what Paul says in Philemon 1:6. It can be a little bit misleading to our ears to read that Paul prays “that the sharing of your faith may become effective.” When we think of sharing our faith, we typically think of teaching the lost evangelistically. But this is not what Paul means. Paul is speaking of the faith that Philemon and Paul share. Paul’s prayer is that the faith that Philemon has, the faith that he shares with Paul, will be put into action (may become effective). It is not that we are allowed to simply know the faith but must perform and act on the faith we share. Practicing our faith leads us to maturity. So Paul says that he knows of Philemon’s love and faith for the brethren and he is praying that this will continue generously because of the faith they share.

In Philemon 1:7 Paul presses this thought further. Paul says that he has personally received much joy and comfort from Philemon’s love. How has Paul seen Philemon’s love? Paul says because the hearts of God’s people have been refreshed through Philemon. The work that Philemon is doing in faith and love to God’s people has impacted Paul so that he takes joy and comfort from knowing how faithful Philemon is toward the brethren.

Does Not Command

There is another fascinating aspect about this letter to Philemon about forgiveness. Not only does Paul never say to forgive and reconcile, but this book never outright commands to forgive or reconcile. But the message to reconcile and forgive is in every statement Paul makes but does not explicitly command it because he does not want to compel or command Philemon. We see this point in verse 8. Paul could take the authority as an apostle and command forgiveness. Paul could simply invoke the authority given to him to compel Philemon to forgive. Further, the apostle Paul says that he is bold enough to do this. Paul is not afraid to command this of Philemon. But this is not what Paul wants to do. The apostle Paul wants Philemon to forgive on his own once hearing what Paul tells him. This is likely why Paul does not refer to himself as an apostle as he opens this letter in Philemon 1:1 but calls himself a prisoner. He refers to his situation again in Philemon 1:9.

Paul desires to appeal to Philemon, not as a superior and not as an apostle, but as an old man and a prisoner of Jesus Christ. Think about how Paul could easily do this. Paul could easily quote scripture from the Old Testament or the very words of Jesus for the necessity of forgiveness. He could quote these words of Jesus:

For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. (Matthew 6:14-15 ESV)

Paul could even quote himself from his other letter that he already sent to this church:
Bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. (Colossians 3:13 ESV)

But this is not what the apostle Paul does. He does not invoke his authority. He does not quote the words of Jesus to command Philemon. He does not quote is words that he already penned to the church in Colosse. So what is the reason Philemon must forgive? If command is not necessary, why should he forgive? In verse 9 the apostle Paul says that he is making his appeal for love’s sake. The apostle Paul says that he has heard of Philemon’s faith and love for all the saints (verse 5) and he has enjoyed much comfort and joy from hearing about Philemon’s love for the saints (verse 7). Therefore, show your Christian love again.

Friends, we forgive one another because that is what love does. We do not begrudgingly forgive because we are commanded to and we are afraid that we will not go to heaven because our sins will not be forgiven. Forgiveness out of compulsion is not Christian forgiveness. If I wronged you and you come to me and tell me that you forgive me because you have to, there is not much restoration and reconciliation of the relationship that is happening. This does not reflect the love and graciousness of God. We forgive because this is love. Forgiveness is exactly what love for Jesus looks like. If we will not forgive other Christians, then we do not have love.

Listen to how Paul has emphasized his desire for Philemon to show Christian love without compulsion throughout this letter. In verse 1 Paul refers to himself as a prisoner, not an apostle. In verse 1 Paul calls Philemon a fellow worker, not a subordinate. In verse 8 he says he will not command Philemon about this matter. In verses 13-14 Paul says could have kept Onesimus but wanted Philemon to do nothing out of compulsion and nothing without his consent. Paul speaks of Philemon as his partner in Philemon 1:17.

Therefore, do not forgive because you have to. Do not forgive because you are commanded to forgive. Forgive because this is what it means to love one another. Forgive because we share in the faith and putting that faith into action demands forgiveness. If we choose to not forgive our brothers and sisters in Christ who come to us and desire to receive forgiveness, then we do not know nor understand the gospel. We do not understand the love of God. We do not understand what it means to be a Christian. We do not know the faith that has been delivered to us once for us. We do not share in the faith revealed to us. Our faith is to be made effective. Paul’s prayer concerning Philemon was that the faith that he shared with Paul and the other believers would be effective, put into action, through forgiving those who have hurt us and wronged us. It does not matter what a person has said or what a person has done. We will examine this more in the next lesson. But for the moment consider from the text that Onesimus has stolen from Philemon. But it does not matter what the wrong is that has been committed. We are to forgive because this is what it means to believe in the Lord and have faith in the Lord.

Let us end by considering verse 20. Yes, brother, I want some benefit from you in the Lord. Refresh my heart in Christ. (Philemon 1:20 ESV) Forgiveness is refreshing. Forgiveness is beautiful. Forgiveness brings joy and comfort. But forgiveness is hard. Our natural temptation is to hold on to our bitterness and grudges because someone has done something wrong against us. But you are showing love and refreshment to that person. Forgiveness is beneficial to all. The soul is refreshed through Christian love and behavior.

But ultimately, why do we need to forgive? We need to forgive because all of us are Onesimus. This letter is preserved for this church and for us because all of us have done wrong and are in need of forgiveness. All of us are Onesimus. We need to forgive because we need to be forgiven. Not only do we need to be forgiven by God, but how many times have you needed your errors and mistakes overlooked by another person? Are we going to pretend that we do not need to be forgiven and therefore act superior and be unwilling to forgive another? Even Paul refused to act superior, who had every right to do so as an apostle. Forgiveness is walking by faith. You have needed to forgiveness from others. You need forgiveness from your God. Forgive others and Christ has forgiven you.

The Encouragement To Forgive

Philemon 1:9-25

In our previous lesson we looked at a man named Philemon who had a runaway slave named Onesimus. Paul’s message to Philemon was the need for forgiveness. But the way Paul speaks to the need for reconciliation and forgiveness was not through command or obligation but out of love. In this lesson we are going to examine the letter for how one is to receive a person back.

A Chance To Reconcile (Philemon 1:10-14)

As Paul writes to Philemon and to the church that meets in his home, he tells Philemon that something amazing has happened. Onesimus has become Paul’s child during his imprisonment. What this means is that somehow through the providence of God, this runaway slave encountered Paul and became a Christian through Paul’s teaching. Now Onesimus is helping and serving Paul during Paul’s imprisonment, so much so that Onesimus has become very useful to Paul spiritually. Now the irony is that Onesimus’ name means useful. But Onesimus had become a useless slave to Philemon, as it appears that he may have stolen from Philemon (18) and apparently was not a hard working person for Philemon. He was useless to Philemon, but is very useful to Paul. So useful is Onesimus to Paul that Paul wants to keep Onesimus with him. Onesimus is so useful and valuable to Paul that Paul says he is sending his very heart to Philemon by sending Onesimus back to him. But Paul did not want to assume the goodness of Philemon. So he is sending Onesimus back to Philemon so that Philemon’s goodness could come from his own desire, not out compulsion.

But I want us to consider what Paul is asking Philemon to do. While the ESV and NASB read, “That your goodness might not be by compulsion” and the NIV reads “favor” rather than “goodness,” most translations read “good deed” (HCSB, NRSV, NKJV, NET). Paul is wanting Philemon to perform a good deed on his own accord and not by compulsion. What is Paul desiring Philemon to do? What is the good deed that he desires from Philemon? There is clearly the desire for forgiveness and reconciliation. This is why Paul has sent Onesimus back to Philemon to see him face to face. Paul could just write a letter asking what to do with Onesimus and send him back if Philemon refused. But Paul wants Onesimus to stand face to face with Philemon. This is the opportunity for these two to be able to reconcile through godly, gracious forgiveness. Paul is going to be a peacemaker and facilitate the opportunity for these two to deal with whatever happened between the two of them.

The Opportunity For Good (Philemon 1:15-16)

The good deed that is presented before Philemon is to forgive and reconcile. Consider that the good deed to merely be letting Paul keep Onesimus has problems without forgiveness and reconciliation. Philemon could have the attitude that Paul can keep that useless slave. He does not want to be around him. He only caused problems when he was with Philemon. He was useless to Philemon in every way. Even taking the financial loss of letting Onesimus stay with Paul would be worth it to get him away from me. Do you see that this would not be a good deed? Philemon can only accomplish a good deed for Paul in giving Onesimus to Paul if the problem between Philemon and Onesimus is resolved. We have no problem staying away from people that we have problems with. We have no problem steering clear of those who have wronged us and harmed us. The hard part is to come face to face with that person and do what is good for the other and not for self. This is what Paul is asking Philemon to do.

You will notice that this is what Paul is preparing Philemon to do earlier in the letter. Paul extolled about how he has heard of Philemon’s love and faith for all the saints (Philemon 1:5). Paul has received joy and comfort because Christians are always refreshed when they are with Philemon (Philemon 1:7). Paul knows that Philemon shares in the same faith as him and will continue to make that faith effective by doing every good thing for the sake of Christ (Philemon 1:6). Paul has even appealed on the basis of love’s sake, rather than commanding what is required of Philemon to do, so that Philemon will have the opportunity to do the right, godly, righteous act. The godly act is not to give Onesimus to Paul without forgiveness and reconciliation, but to forgive and set him free to serve Paul on Philemon’s behalf.

I love how Paul presents this idea to Philemon in Philemon 1:15-16. Paul says that maybe the reason Onesimus was gone for this time was so that Philemon would be able to enjoy Onesimus forever. But he would not enjoy him as a slave any longer, but as a beloved brother in Christ. Paul says that if Onesimus is a beloved brother to me, how much more will he be for you! Here is Paul making the observation that these things may have happened so that Onesimus would become a believer in Jesus and now they would be able to enjoy a far greater and different relationship. Now the relationship is not that of a slave, but as a brother in Christ who is with Philemon not only in the flesh, but also in the Lord. Their physical relationship will be different and now they have a new spiritual relationship because Onesimus is now a Christian. I love that Paul presents the possibility that this was God working through this whole scene. Please consider that the likelihood of Onesimus running away from Colosse, traveling all the way to Rome, and meeting Paul is absolutely amazing. The apostle Paul has in mind the idea that is presented in the life of Joseph: what was meant for evil God has now worked out for good (Genesis 50:20). Onesimus’ actions were certainly evil. He has caused harm to Philemon. If Philemon were in the wrong in this situation, Paul would have certainly rebuked Philemon for his actions or words. But that does not happen in this letter. So we are left to understand that Onesimus is in the wrong and has done wrong against Philemon. But look at the good that has happened through this!

How was Joseph able to forgive and reconcile with his brothers who had done so much evil against him? What helped Joseph not retaliate or respond in an ungodly way? Joesph recognized that the evil done against him was used by God to accomplish good. Friends, we are able to forgive someone who has done wrong to us because we know the great power of God to accomplish good through our suffering and through our hurt. This is why James can tell us to count it all joy when we encounter various trials. Good is being accomplished by what we are enduring which frees us to be forgiving. The apostle Paul presents this very idea to Philemon. God has done something great with the pain experienced and the loss suffered. Onesimus is now a brother in Christ and has been serving Paul. God is working in the matter and is accomplishing his purposes.

Receive Him (Philemon 1:17-20)

Notice that the apostle Paul continues this teaching about reconciliation. Listen to Philemon 1:17. “Receive him and you would receive me.” How does it sound like Philemon would receive Paul? They sound like they are great friends. Paul calls Philemon a beloved fellow worker (Philemon 1:1). In Philemon 1:17 Paul speaks of Philemon has his partner. In Philemon 1:22 Paul states that he is hoping to come stay with him in his house. Now Philemon, receive Onesimus as you would receive me. Even though Onesimus has caused you harm, he is to receive him as if he were receiving Paul himself. This teaches us what forgiveness and reconciliation look like. You will receive the person back to you like you were receiving Christ himself or an apostle of our Lord Jesus. Forgiveness is not merely a lack of retaliation. Forgiveness is about restoration. Forgiveness is about how we receive each other and have relationships with each other. Please think about the fact that this is the way God receives us when we are forgiven. Forgiveness does not merely mean that God will not execute wrath on us for what we have done. Forgiveness also means that we are fully restored into relationship with God. Forgiveness means that we are reconciled to our God. Forgiveness without reconciliation is not forgiveness at all. I love the way that Paul gives Philemon this picture. Receive him as you would receive me because that is what Christian love and forgiveness looks like.

Now one can imagine the potential inner turmoil Philemon might have, as we may have as well when it comes for forgiving our brother or sister in Christ. We might consider all the wrong that happened to us and all the suffering we endured. But listen to Paul’s response to this potential objection. “If he has wronged you at all, or owes you anything, charge that to my account.” Paul says that he will repay whatever the debt is. Philemon, you write down all the wrongs and debts that Onesimus has against you and you charge this to my account. I, Paul, will pay it. But this is not what Paul wants. Listen to the rest of what Paul says: “To say nothing of your owing me even your own self” (Philemon 1:19). Paul does not want a list of wrongs but wants Philemon to realize how he owes his own life and also possess a great debt. Paul is telling Philemon to erase the account of wrongs and be willing to absorb the debt against him. The New Testament repeatedly uses this picture as how Christians respond to wrongs done against them. Paul wrote the Corinthian church and told them that love does not keep a record of wrongs (1 Corinthians 13:5). Paul also wrote in that same letter to those Christians who had wrongs against each other and were taking each other to court over those matters:

Why not rather suffer wrong? Why not rather be defrauded? But you yourselves wrong and defraud—even your own brothers! (1 Corinthians 6:7-8 ESV)

Just suffer the wrong! Why not be defrauded? This is your Christian brother or sister. You are acting wrong and defrauding rather than just suffering wrong. We forgive the record of wrongs that a Christian has committed against us because we certainly have a record of debts that others have against us, and, more importantly, we have a debt that cannot be paid to God. We owe our very lives to the Lord. How can we possibly withhold forgiveness when we have such a great debt forgiven by our God? We forgive others because God has forgiven us.

Going Above and Beyond (Philemon 1:21)

Not only this, Paul knows that because Philemon is a lover of the Lord that he will go above and beyond what Paul is asking. This is to be our desire! We should not begrudgingly do the minimum for another. We should go above and beyond for our brother and sister in Christ who desires forgiveness.

Gracious Giving Oneself (Philemon 1:22)

Going above and beyond is the giving even of ourselves. Notice that Paul does not say that he plans to come visit Philemon. Listen to how Paul says this in verse 22: “I will be graciously given to you.” Christians give themselves for each other. I give my life to you and you give your life to me. We adopt a whole new view of life and view of each other when we belong to Christ. Now we see each other as people who belong to Christ, partners of grace, family in Christ, which trumps all else. Family overlooks, forgives, and gives themselves to each other. We are family in Christ and we graciously give ourselves to one another.

The gospel takes our unworthiness and uselessness and makes us useful to the Lord. We are made useful by grace. The gospel radically transforms lives and radically alters our relationships with each other. We set aside our rights with each other and give ourselves to each other. We have been forgiven and received by God so that we can become useful again. We must forgive and receive one another, even if they have harmed us, so that they can be useful to the family of Christ again. Forgiveness is the opportunity for good to come from the evil that has happened previously.

Thanksgiving and Prayer

Philemon 1:1-7

Open It

1. Who has prayed for you in the past?

2. What role have someone’s words of encouragement played in your life?

3. How much of what is said to you each week at work and home is negative or positive?

Explore It

1.    Who wrote this letter? (Philemon 1:1)

2.    To whom was this letter written? (Philemon 1:1)

3.    What do we know about the church from this brief introduction? (Philemon 1:2)

4.    What two godly qualities did Paul desire for his readers? (Philemon 1:3)

5.    What was always a part of Paul’s prayers? (Philemon 1:4)

6.    What had Paul heard about the readers of this letter? (Philemon 1:5)

7.    How did Paul pray for his audience? (Philemon 1:6)

8.     What did Paul suggest that Philemon would gain by actively sharing his faith? (Philemon 1:6)

9.     What had Philemon done for Paul? (Philemon 1:7)

10.     What had Philemon done for the other Christians in the region? (Philemon 1:7)

Get It

1.     When are the normal times in a day or week that you pray?

2.     What are the subjects or concerns you most often address in your prayers?

3.     What are the marks or ingredients of a good prayer?

4.     When should we ever tell someone that we are praying for him or her?

5.    What is your reaction when someone says he or she is praying for you?

6.     How does it help a person to tell him or her that you are praying for them?

7.    How can compliments and encouragement influence someone’s life?

8.     How does it help a person to pray for him or her?

9.    What is the difference between what a person should and should not pray for?

Apply It

1.    Who are several people for whom you need to pray this week?

2.    Who in your life needs a word of compliment or encouragement at this time?

3.    Whom could you write or call this week to thank for the joy or encouragement they have given to you during your life?

Paul’s Plea for Onesimus

Philemon 1:8-25

Open It

1. When you have to ask someone for a favor, how do you go about it?

2. How would you welcome back into your home a family member who had run away?

3. What does it take to reestablish trust with someone who has made a major mistake?

Explore It

1.    What type of attitude did Paul project toward Philemon? (Philemon 1:8-9)

2.    How did Paul describe himself? (Philemon 1:9)

3.    Who is the subject of Paul’s appeal to Philemon? (Philemon 1:10)

4.    How did Paul describe his relationship with Onesimus? (Philemon 1:10-11)

5.    Why was Paul sending Onesimus back to Philemon? (Philemon 1:12-16)

6.    What was Onesimus’s former relationship to Philemon? (Philemon 1:12-16)

7.    What was Paul’s motivation for sending Onesimus back to Philemon when Paul could have used him as a helper? (Philemon 1:12-14)

8.    What happened to Onesimus during the time he had been away from Philemon and with Paul? (Philemon 1:15-16)

9.     How did Paul want Philemon to greet Onesimus when he returned? (Philemon 1:17)

10.     To what level was Paul willing to be involved in the reconciliation between Philemon and Onesimus? (Philemon 1:18-19)

11.     Of what debt did Paul remind Philemon? (Philemon 1:19)

12.     What response from Philemon did Paul anticipate? (Philemon 1:20-21) Why?

13.     For what future event did Paul hope? (Philemon 1:22)

Get It

1.     Why do you think this short letter related to a specific relationship problem is included in the Bible?

2.    Why do you think was it important to Paul that Onesimus return to his former master?

3.     What risks did Onesimus take by going back to Philemon?

4.    How should someone else’s new commitment to Christ change our relationship with him or her?

5.     In what circumstances should Christians return to people they knew before their conversion to rectify past mistakes?

6.    What role should we play in helping people be reconciled to others with whom they have had conflicts?

7.    What do you think was Philemon’s response when Onesimus returned to him? Why?

Apply It

1.    What broken relationship or promise from your earlier life are you willing to take steps to rectify this week?

2.    What can you do this week to help other people settle their disputes or separation?

3.    Who needs your affirmation this week to help him or her more fully understand the changes God is working in his or her life?